Thom Rainer (President of Lifeway Christian Resources) just posted an entry on his blog about seven ways that a pastor's family needs to be protected. You can read the whole post here. The abbreviated list is this:
Thom's list seems pretty natural in the typical church setting. But what if a ministry wasn't "typical"? How would this list be different?
- Expectations - What if a group of people loved each other enough that expectations were dropped to minimals? That even the pastor was given room to fail? People who attend church all their lives have learned different responsibilities taken on by their many pastors. The idea of all those responsibilities culminating and being placed on one person is a bit overwhelming. In today's leadership, you can't miss an email, have to return every phone call, reply to every text, be available 24/7, know every status posted on Facebook, Twitter and Instagram, never miss a hospital visit or procedure, recognize every birthday, answer every theological question and deal with every crisis/issue. Never mind that you might be having your own personal crisis. That is just an abbreviated list of expectations. Personal behavior wasn't even mentioned yet!
Is it possible to be a leader of group of people and not be the leader? Wouldn't that be the ideal situation? What if the pastor was just like everyone else? What if everyone that was a part of the church/community had the same responsibilities? What if all the hospital visits were shared by everyone, crisis dealt with by many who are capable? What if the teaching responsibility was shared among the spiritually mature? It seems like most of the items listed in Thom's list would become less significant as part of the group. Can a pastor lead in such a way that help which comes from others is seen as ministry fulfilled by the group?
Without sounding pious... the only real leader is Jesus. Colossians 1:18 - He is also head of the body, the church; Jesus works in the lives of all believers. As they choose to follow His lead, ministry will be done... by Him. Can we not trust that truth enough to see it happen? If that is the case, He will provide plenty for #7.
- Some churches have unreasonable expectations of the family members of pastors.
- Too many pastors put church members before their family members.
- Some church members are critics of the pastor’s spouse.
- Some church members are critics of the pastor’s children.
- Pastors’ children can rebel.
- Too many pastors get too involved with church members of the opposite gender.
- Low pay can put stress on the pastor’s family.
Thom's list seems pretty natural in the typical church setting. But what if a ministry wasn't "typical"? How would this list be different?
- Expectations - What if a group of people loved each other enough that expectations were dropped to minimals? That even the pastor was given room to fail? People who attend church all their lives have learned different responsibilities taken on by their many pastors. The idea of all those responsibilities culminating and being placed on one person is a bit overwhelming. In today's leadership, you can't miss an email, have to return every phone call, reply to every text, be available 24/7, know every status posted on Facebook, Twitter and Instagram, never miss a hospital visit or procedure, recognize every birthday, answer every theological question and deal with every crisis/issue. Never mind that you might be having your own personal crisis. That is just an abbreviated list of expectations. Personal behavior wasn't even mentioned yet!
Is it possible to be a leader of group of people and not be the leader? Wouldn't that be the ideal situation? What if the pastor was just like everyone else? What if everyone that was a part of the church/community had the same responsibilities? What if all the hospital visits were shared by everyone, crisis dealt with by many who are capable? What if the teaching responsibility was shared among the spiritually mature? It seems like most of the items listed in Thom's list would become less significant as part of the group. Can a pastor lead in such a way that help which comes from others is seen as ministry fulfilled by the group?
Without sounding pious... the only real leader is Jesus. Colossians 1:18 - He is also head of the body, the church; Jesus works in the lives of all believers. As they choose to follow His lead, ministry will be done... by Him. Can we not trust that truth enough to see it happen? If that is the case, He will provide plenty for #7.
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